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Bunnings sells out of hard hats within minutes of federal election being called

Major hardware and workwear retailers across the country are already reporting a surge in demand for hard hats and hi-vis vests, as upper-middle class politicians rush to dress up as everyday, hardworking blue collar tradespeople for the next 4 weeks.

Bunnings Carinbah, in the Sutherland Shire, said its workwear shelves had been stripped bare by midday, while the Marrickville Mitre10 in the electorate of Grayndler, also reported a rush on hard hats and hi-vis. Vintage clothing sellers in Fitzroy, in the seat of Melbourne, reported an increase in demand for recycled hi-vis clothing.   

A spokesperson for Total Workwear – a supplier of clothing and safety equipment for tradespeople – said the company had received several enquiries from the offices of MPs looking to dress up as tradies. “Who knew standing in front of a camera and doing absolutely fucking nothing was so dangerous?” he said.

ABC electorate analyst Antony Green said it would be a tight contest. “This election will be a chance for Australians to choose which inner-city, university-educated Sydney man pretending to be a builder they want in Canberra”.

Samantha Wright, an occupational health and safety expert, said politicians wearing hi-vis clothing during a media conference served an important safety purpose. “It’s so that other people can immediately, in an emergency situation, identify who the fuckhead is”.

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