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The Shovel is Australia's Satire News Site.
Government Gives $7 Billion Subsidy To Bitcoin After Learning It Involves Mining
"Someone told me it involved mining and I said, 'we need to start subsidising this immediately"
‘Oceans Fourteen’ Just Matt Damon Breaking Into A TAB To Put A Bet On A Dog
Call Centre Receiving Unusually High Volume Of Calls For 4,563rd Day Straight
Government To Create 250,000 New Job Announcements Over Next Two Years
Government Announces Budget Surplus Of Negative $161 Billion
“Now Is Not The Time To Talk About Building A Quarantine Facility”
News In Brief
Mark Zuckerberg – Dead At 36 – Says Social Media Sites Should Not Fact Check Posts
Man Shaves 1.7 Seconds Off 2-Hour Flight By Standing Up As Soon As Plane Lands
Centrelink Caller Qualifies for Aged Pension While On Hold
Smoking e-Cigarettes Significantly Lowers Risk Of Looking Cool, Report Finds
NAPLAN Results Could Be Gooder, Government Concedes
I Went Without My Phone For A Week And, Oh Fuck This Is Such A Boring Article
Phones Work With Speakerphone Off, Wankers Told
Phrase ‘Political Correctness Gone Mad’ Insensitive To Mad People, Committee Finds
Frydenberg Starts Budget Speech With Reminder That All Figures Are Correct To Closest $60 Billion
$230 Billion In Budget Earmarked For Empathy Training
Bill And Melinda Gates’s Marriage Has Encountered A Problem And Needs To Close
Australians Fleeing Bushfires To Be Jailed For 5 Years
Government Finally Announces Plans To Construct Custom-Built Jail For Returning Australians
Totally Fucking Up Immunisation Rollout Was Part Of God’s Plan, Morrison Says
Laming says empathy course helped him put himself in someone else’s shoes. Without their consent. While hiding in a bush.
Andrew Laming Diagnosed As A Fuckhead
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India Changes Name To ‘Aspen’ To Enable Australian Citizens To Fly Home
11 Quotes From The Bible That Back Up Scott Morrison’s Claim He’s ‘Doing God’s Work’
Government In Talks With Essendon FC To Learn How To Successfully Rollout Injection Program
Morrison Meets With Advisers To See If Vaccine Can Be Delivered Using Existing Copper Network
We’ve Received A Leaked Copy Of The Liberal Party’s Empathy Training Program
Why The Shovel Was Awarded The Contract To Oversee Australia’s Vaccination Rollout: A Statement