November 9, 2015

Myer CEO To Sing National Anthem At Next Year’s Melbourne Cup

Myer CEO Richard Umbers will sing Advance Australia Fair at the Melbourne Cup from now on, to avoid any confusion

April 20, 2015

Malcolm Turnbull Downs A Glass Of 1998 Bordeaux In Under 26 Minutes

Communications Minister Malcolm Turnbull has shown his lighter side, finishing a glass of limited release Bordeaux and a bowl of

March 19, 2015

George Brandis Quietly Shitting Himself After Passing Metadata Legislation He Doesn’t Remotely Understand

Wearing a nervous smile and trying to conceal the sweat building under his glasses, Attorney General George Brandis was today

March 4, 2015

Tony Abbott Has Full Support Of Australia’s Flags

Australia’s flags came out in a show of support for embattled Prime Minister Tony Abbott today

January 27, 2015

Tony Abbott Wakes With Nagging Feeling He Gave A British Monarch A Knighthood Yesterday

Prime Minister Tony Abbott woke up this morning with a thumping headache and a vague recollection of awarding a racist

October 14, 2014

Fax Machines Are Our Future, Says Abbott

Prime Minister Tony Abbott today opened a new fax machine factory in Melbourne’s west, saying the telecommunications devices were ‘friends

July 18, 2014

Corporal Punishment, 1950s To Be Reintroduced To School Curriculum

Students who misbehave in class will be hit with a strap and told to wait in the 1950s until they