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Posts Tagged ‘Australian satire’

Government deports itself for stoking anti-vax sentiment
"The Government is a risk to civil order and public health"
Morrison confirms order of 10 million RATs, encourages other Australian families to do the same
"This should give Australians reassurance that I have what I need"
landfill
Innovative new shopping service allows customers to send Christmas gifts directly to landfill
"Cut out the middle man"
Police urge residents not to visit ‘seedy, unsafe’ district of Canberra
"We're advising people to avoid the area"
Scott Morrison shows he’s just an ordinary bloke by getting hair cut in front of 50-person camera crew
"It was just a spur of the moment carefully orchestrated thing”
More ScoMo leaked texts revealed
"For fucks sake Scott I just asked if you could water the grevilleas"
Government shows commitment to reducing waste by developing environmental policy on back of envelope
"The Coalition is very committed to doing the absolute least required"
Man announces he will quit drinking by 2050
He has assured friends it will not affect his drinking plans in the short or medium term
Daniel Andrews Refuses To Scrap 9pm Curfew But Agrees To Let Melburnians Read In Bed Until 9:30
"This is not an invitation to stay up all night"
Morrison Calls Inquiry To Determine Whether He Knew He Was Prime Minister At Time Of Brittany Higgins Assault
"It's possible nobody knew"
‘Vaccine Swap’: Singapore Furious To Discover They Will Be ‘First In Line’ To Receive Pfizer Doses From Australia
The clause means Singapore won't receive the return doses until
Australia Offers Immediate Asylum To All Au Pairs Trapped In Afghanistan
"It's desperate. Do you know how hard it is to get a full-time nanny these days?”"
Remorseful Scott Morrison Says He Is Willing To Accept Responsibility For Brisbane’s Successful Olympics Bid
“This one’s on me. Not the bid committee, not the Queensland Premier. I have to own this"
Army To Draw On Iraq, Afghanistan Experience – Expects To Have Vaccine Rollout Complete In 19 Years
"It will be mission accomplished within weeks, or by 2040 at the latest"
‘Whoops! I Forgot To Buy Enough Vaccines’, By Greg Hunt
"The truth is, I did intend to buy more. But then I saw this great offer for a cheaper vaccine, and I thought, well if you’re going to scrimp on something, this is the thing to do it on"

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