February 1, 2016

Forthcoming Recession To Provide Welcome Respite From Labor’s Economic Emergency

The recession that many believe will hit Australia within the next few years is a sign the economy is slowly

December 9, 2015

Hockey To Balance Dual Tasks Of US Ambassadorship And Finalising 2014 Budget

Former Treasurer Joe Hockey says he is confident he can manage the day-to-day tasks of his new US ambassador role

November 25, 2015

Allowing Syrian Refugees A “Slippery Slope” Toward Letting In Polygamous Animal Refugees: Bernardi

Coalition senator Cory Bernardi says that by allowing Syrian refugees entry into the country, Australia will be sending a message to

September 25, 2015

Halal Linked To Terrorism By Complex Series Of Imaginary Connections In Cory Bernardi’s Head, Enquiry Finds

Money raised from halal certification passes through a network of intricate pathways in South Australian Senator Cory Bernardi’s brain, before

September 23, 2015

Shorten Relieved It’s No Longer A Contest Of Personalities

Opposition Leader Bill Shorten is massively relieved that the next election will not be contested on the basis of personality

July 8, 2015

Bill Shorten Failed To Disclose He Was Opposition Leader, Royal Commission Finds

Labor figure Bill Shorten is Australia’s Opposition Leader, the Royal Commission into trade unions has uncovered

June 14, 2015

We’ll Do ‘Whatever It Takes’ To Smash Existing People Smuggling Syndicate, Says New People Smuggling Syndicate

Evidence is emerging that a powerful new people smuggling syndicate, possibly based in Canberra, is gaining influence in the hotly-contested

June 4, 2015

Citizenship To Be Replaced With Letter Of Commendation From Peter Dutton

Australians will need to get a personal recommendation from Immigration minister Peter Dutton if they want to keep living in

May 14, 2015

Shorten Captures Imagination Of Nation In Rousing Budget Reply Dream

Bill Shorten set parliament – and Australian living rooms – alight last night in a captivating dream at his Canberra

May 8, 2015

Maurice Newman Is A Hoax, Sources Confirm

Tony Abbott’s chief business advisor Maurice Newman is an elaborate prank, it has been revealed

May 5, 2015

Abbott To Present Royal Baby With Australia’s Very Best Piece Of Coal

Australia’s official gift to the new-born daughter of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge will be the nation’s most beautiful

April 27, 2015

Hockey Meets With Cabinet To Start Developing Next Year’s Budget Backdowns

Treasurer Joe Hockey met with senior ministers today to start formulating the key 2015 budgetary measures that will be humiliatingly

April 20, 2015

Malcolm Turnbull Downs A Glass Of 1998 Bordeaux In Under 26 Minutes

Communications Minister Malcolm Turnbull has shown his lighter side, finishing a glass of limited release Bordeaux and a bowl of

April 17, 2015

Little Boy Not Giving Victoria Its Funding Back Until They Let Him Play With His Cars

A fifty-seven year-old little boy says he will keep Victoria’s transport funding locked up in a secret box underneath his

March 11, 2015

Tony Abbott “Sick And Tired” Of Being Held To First World Standards

The Prime Minister is totally fed up with being bullied into meeting the expectations of morally-developed nations