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San Diego Zookeepers Knew Something Wrong When Gorillas Started Hoarding Toilet Paper
“When they started baking sourdough, I knew for certain"
Hillary Clinton’s Emails Invaded Capitol, Trump Supporters Claim
"Those are not Trump supporters, they are Hillary Clinton’s emails disguised to look like Trump supporters”
Man Arrested For Broken Tail Light Starting To Wish He’d Just Invaded The Nation’s Capitol And Tried To Overthrow The Government
"What was I thinking? Drawing attention to myself like that?"
Garth Brooks Urgently Asked To Play Free Concert In DC To Lure Trump Supporters From Capitol Building
“As soon as they hear the opening chords to ‘Ain’t Going Down ‘Till The Sun Comes Up’ they’ll run out of the building"
National Guard Finally Storms Capitol Building After Black Janitor Accidentally Enters Building Through Wrong Doorway
"This is now a dangerous and highly volatile situation"
The Queen’s 2020 Christmas Message Is A Bit Different This Year
"Some fucktrumpet thought he could outsmart a virus by buying 400 packets of spaghetti"
Ghislaine Maxwell’s First Day in Prison
Ghislaine Maxwell, notorious associate of Jeffrey Epstein, quickly begins to suspect her guards aren’t taking her safety seriously. This is
First COVID Vaccine Recipient Already Being Bombarded With Microsoft Office Update Requests
"Being controlled by Bill Gates is more annoying than I expected"
BREAKING: Rudy Giuliani Contracts COVID, Rushed To Johns Hopkins Total Landscaping For Treatment
"He was not taken to the Johns Hopkins Hospital as previously advised".
Rudy Giuliani Has Already Filed 37 Law Suits Against His COVID-19 Infection
He has lost every single one.
The Real Human Rights Abuse Is That The Chinese Now Have To Pay $199 For A Bottle Of Yellow Tail Shiraz
Has someone called the
Team Trump Now Claiming Joe Biden Stole Election By Getting More People To Vote For Him
“What we’re seeing here is a large scale attempt by the electorate to install Joe Biden"
Chinese Citizens Told They Must Condemn Australia’s Human Rights Record, Or Risk Imprisonment
“We ask citizens to publicly condemn Australia’s human rights record on a state-controlled social media platform of their choosing,”
Morrison Appoints Scott Cam To Rebuild Relationship With China
"It's time to take foreign policy seriously"
“We’ve Uncovered A Sophisticated Plan To Rig The Election” Say People Who Accidentally Booked A Press Conference At A Landscaping Company
“We've crossed our i's and dotted our t's" said the man standing outside a run-down warehouse next to a sex shop”.