The Nation
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Morrison Says Australia Will Not Join Iran Conflict, Given Australia Only Accounts For 1% Of World’s Military Spend
Scott Morrison says there is absolutely no point joining any military action against Iran, given Australia accounts for such a small percentage of the world’s...
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Parliament Approves Urgent Leave For Politicians Who’ve Had Their Holidays Cut Short
The federal government has granted an additional four week’s paid leave to all politicians forced to return early from overseas holidays to do their jobs.
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Morrison Auctions Off Hawaiian Deck Chair For Bushfire Appeal
Moved by similar initiatives from ordinary Australians across the country, Scott Morrison has announced that he will auction off the chair he sat in while...
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Clear Link Between Craig Kelly And Total Fucking Stupidity, Scientists Claim
An overwhelming proportion of scientists now accept that Liberal MP Craig Kelly is a fucking idiot, new analysis shows.
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Morrison Launches New Ad Campaign To Apologise For Previous Ad Campaign
Scott Morrison has apologised to anyone who was offended by his bushfire-related advertisement, in a slick new advertisement released today.
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Firefighters Given Vital Extra TV Commercials To Help Fight New Blazes
Firefighters were breathing a sigh of relief tonight after learning the Federal government had fast-tracked essential new propaganda ads, which will be used to help...
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Scomo Says The Nation’s Bushfire Situation Has Improved Today, With Australia 3 For 283 At Stumps.
Scott Morrison says the bushfire crisis gripping the nation is improving, with Australia making a solid start to the first day of the third test...
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Dutton Calls For Turnback Of Boat Spotted Off Coast Of Mallacoota
Home Affairs Minister Peter Dutton has asked Australian Border Force to intercept a boat spotted off the coast of Mallacoota in Victoria’s far east.
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ScoMo Declares Empathy Training A Success After Totally Nailing Meet-And-Greet
Scott Morrison says the $190,000 he paid to hire an empathy consultant last year has paid dividends, after he effortlessly connected with locals in Cobargo...
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ScoMo Volunteers To Join Firefighters In Hawaii, After House Fire Breaks Out Near Waikiki
Prime Minister Scott Morrison has volunteered to join fire fighters in Hawaii, after a house fire broke out near Waikiki beach.
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