Entertainment
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Vacuous, Attention-Seeking Reality TV Star Meets With Kim Kardashian
A narcissistic social media star who is famous merely for being famous has met with Kim Kardashian at the White House.
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Barnaby Joyce, Vikki Campion To Use $150k Interview Money To Pay For Their Son’s Therapy When He’s Older
Barnaby Joyce and his new partner Vikki Campion have sold the story of their relationship to the Seven Network for $150,000, saying they would put...
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Unemployed London Man Marries Successful Hollywood Actress
In a fairytale love story that has captured hearts across the world, a retired army officer from England has married a popular American actress in...
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Here’s The Official Apology From The ABC Regarding Their Description Of Tony Abbott
The ABC’s news division was today censured for describing Tony Abbott as ‘the most destructive politician of his generation’. Here is the official policy from...
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Child Born Into Welfare Dependency
In another example of the growing scourge of inter-generational welfare dependency, a London baby today joined its two siblings in a family entirely reliant on...
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Attention-Seeking Fake Blonde Had Sex With Stormy Daniels, 60 Minutes Reveals
Some desperate-for-money blonde with big tits once had sex with Stormy Daniels, a 60 Minute interview has exposed.
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Facebook Doesn’t Store Your Data, Mark Zuckerberg Assures James Samuel Wilson Of 1/45 Malvern Ave, Heidelberg Heights
Wishing him a happy birthday for last week and complimenting him on the new shirt he bought today, Mark Zuckerburg reassured 26 year-old, university educated,...
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God Says He’ll Eliminate All Suffering For A Year If His Post Gets 1 Million Likes
The Almighty Father has set his followers a fun new challenge, saying he’ll put an end to all grief, anguish and suffering for 12 months...
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The Shovel Fails To Win Fake News Award
In a disappointing boost to its credibility, The Shovel failed to win a single award in the highly anticipated 2017 Fake News Awards announced by...
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House Of Cards Sacks President Over Sexual Assault Claims, In Wild Diversion From Reality
After being lauded for its brutally realistic portrayal of American politics for five seasons, House of Cards has decided to shift into the fantasy genre,...
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Autism Experts Diagnose Don Burke As ‘A Fuckwit’
Several experts in Asperger’s syndrome and autism have carefully analysed Don Burke’s behaviour and concluded that he is in fact a common arsehole.
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People Outraged That Date Of Music Countdown They Don’t Listen To Has Changed
Angry people around the country who don’t listen to the Hottest 100 on January 26 are furious that they’ll now not listen to it on...
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Members Of AC/DC Unable To Name Single Turnbull Policy
Aussie rockers AC/DC were at a loss when asked to name their favourite Turnbull Government policy, during an embarrassing interview on Triple M this morning.
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Famed Spanish Restorer Called In To Fix $450 Million ‘Salvator Mundi’
Selling for a world-record $450 million at auction last night, Leonardo Da Vinci’s Salvator Mundi ‘still needed some work’, according to experts.
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Donald Trump Uses Twitter’s New 280 Character Limit To Write Down All The Words He Knows
Twitter’s increased character limit has been met with a mixed response so far. But its most famous user is said to be ecstatic, telling aides...
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