All posts by The Shovel
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Bridget McKenzie Has Moved To The Coalition Backbenches, Which Incidentally Have Been Beautifully Upgraded Thanks To A Generous Government Grant
Bridget McKenzie has resigned from her ministerial role, and will take up a position on the Coalition backbenches – tastefully restored thanks to a $500,000...
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Morrison Relieved To Finally Have A Crisis That Involves Barring People From Entering Australia
After weeks of being forced to deal with the boring details of the domestic bushfire crisis, Scott Morrison says he finally feels himself again after...
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The Shovel Crossword #2
It’s the one thing that’s been missing from your life this whole time – a satirical crossword. It’s just like the New York Times crossword,...
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Most Coronavirus Cases Caused By Arson, The Australian Claims
At least two thirds of all instances of the deadly coronavirus have been deliberately started by arsonists, the country’s national newspaper says.
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Morrison Says Australians Quarantined On Christmas Island Will Be Processed As Quickly As Possible And Can Expect To Be Off The Island Within 14 Years
Australia’s rapid processing protocols mean those quarantined on Christmas island due to coronavirus fears can expect to be home by the end of 2034, the...
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Now Is Not The Time To Talk About Coronavirus, Morrison Says
Talking about coronavirus while millions of people are at threat from it, is completely inappropriate, the Prime Minister says.
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Prince Andrew Says He Can’t Talk To FBI Due To Rare Vocal Cord Disorder
Prince Andrew has used a series of hand-written signs to reveal that he has a rare vocal cord condition which prohibits him from being interviewed...
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Australia Day Honours: Fraser Anning Awarded For Services To Race Relations
Former senator and current neo-Nazi Fraser Anning has been honoured for his tireless work advocating for racial equality.
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Tanya Plibersek Calls For Australian School Children To Recite Key Research Outcomes From Labor Party Focus Groups
Saying Australians had lost touch with the key drivers influencing the 55-79 year-old outer-suburban voting demographic, Labor minister Tanya Plibersek has called for all school...
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“Credit Where It’s Due: Bettina Arndt’s Work For Men’s Rights Means Men Finally Have Influence In Australia”
EDITORIAL: The decision to award men’s rights activist Bettina Arndt an Order Of Australia for services to gender equality has been met with much criticism....
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Sex Is Only For Heterosexual Couples, Says Man Wearing GORGEOUS Gold Hat
An English man wearing a stunning yellow and gold striped dress, delightfully accessorised with a striking gold and emerald green hat, has reaffirmed his view...
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Red Cross Appoints Bridget McKenzie, To Ensure Bushfire Money Goes Where It’s Needed Most
The Australian Red Cross has responded to the public’s concerns about its allocation of bushfire donations, appointing funding allocation expert Bridget McKenzie to its team....
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The Shovel Crossword #1
It’s the one thing that’s been missing from your life this whole time – a satirical crossword. It’s just like the New York Times crossword,...
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Bridget McKenzie Insists Grants Program Provided Level Playing Field, “Especially For The Mosman Lawn Bowls Club, Which Now Has One Of The Levelist Playing Fields I’ve Seen”
Bridget McKenzie has hit back at suggestions her sports grant program didn’t provide a level playing field, saying critics clearly haven’t played on the Mosman...
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Who Is Going To Ensure We Don’t Have Sex With Animals, Now That Cory Bernardi Has Retired?
EDITORIAL: This week Cory Bernardi resigned from politics. It’s a well-deserved break, after a stunning 13-year career, but we urge him to reconsider his decision....
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