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Governor General contracts COVID-19 despite self isolating for the past 2.5 years

Australia’s Governor General, whose name we can’t remember right now, has tested positive for COVID-19 despite not going out in public since he took up the position in July 2019.

In a statement this morning, staff said [insert name here when you find it] would be isolating at Admiralty House. It is unclear whether the statement was in response to the positive test or just a general, templated statement that staff release each day.

Health experts say the positive case shows just how clever and adaptive the virus can be. “If you think you’re safe from this virus, think again. COVID-19 has been able to find the Governor General when no-one else could,” one epidemiologist said.

Australians have been shocked by the news, with many saying they had totally forgotten we had a Governor General.

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