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Morrison finally responds to climate crisis by announcing Religious Discrimination bill

After years of indecision and uncertainty, the Prime Minister has finally taken action on global warming by releasing the third iteration of a bill that will give religious institutions the right to fire gay people.

As Australians were hit by more and more extreme weather events, Mr Morrison said people needed practical solutions. “With our bushfire seasons becoming more intense, sea levels rising and arable land decreasing, you can be reassured that your government is doing everything it can to give religious people the opportunity to bully trans kids and post sexist memes on Facebook,” the PM said.

Mr Morrison said he was always listening to the concerns of ordinary Australians. “They say to me, ‘Scomo I just want my kids to have a future without having to worry about climate change destroying the world. And I say, ‘I hear you – soon your school will be able to sack your child’s teacher if they’re gay’.

The Prime Minister said that as people tried to make sense of the changing climate, there were two words on everyone’s lips – religious discrimination. “I hear it every time I go to my multi-million dollar tax-exempt church”.

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