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Security guards at Melbourne’s quarantine hotels say they will take situation seriously from now on and wear appropriate protection when having sex with guests

Security contractors responsibly for guarding Melbourne’s quarantine hotels have apologised for not following proper protocols, and have committed to wearing appropriate protection when having sex with returned travellers from now on.

Many security guards have been accused of not wearing protective gear properly when carrying luggage or banging guests. But a spokesperson for the firm said they had now enhanced their safety procedures.

“We understand that this is a serious situation, and we want to stop any problems before they happen. That’s why, from today, all of our staff have been told that if they go back to a guest’s room for a drink, or to watch Netflix or for a sex party, they will need be carrying the correct personal protective equipment. No exceptions”.

He said they understood the potential consequences of lax protective procedures. “The last thing we want to do is get someone pregnant”.

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