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Time To Start Loosening Lockdown Restrictions, Virus Says

The COVID-19 virus has called on the government to get people back to work as soon as possible.

Saying it was ridiculous that it was still prohibited for large groups to congregate in public places, the Virus For The Economy lobby group declared that it was essential to start easing lockdown restrictions as soon as possible.

“All we want is for people to be able to go back to work and go about their daily lives again – that’s what we’re calling for. It’s as simple as that,” a spokesperson for the group said.

“The economic losses are mounting. If we don’t open up office buildings, public transport and city streets soon, we could lose all of the gains that we’ve made to date. We’re in danger of being out of work for good if this continues”.

The spokesperson called on government officials to rethink restrictions on social gatherings too. “Like everyone else, we’re dying to be able to go to house parties and nightclubs again. Let’s get things back up and running”.

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