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Most Coronavirus Cases Caused By Arson, The Australian Claims

At least two thirds of all instances of the deadly coronavirus have been deliberately started by arsonists, the country’s national newspaper says.

In a lengthy editorial today, The Australian used historical figures from suburban house fires to provide irrefutable evidence of the virus’s cause.  

“When you look at the house fires data, overlay it with fuel load statistics, then change the y-axis label to ‘coronavirus’, it’s very clear that there’s a strong historical link between arson activity and this epidemic,” the editorial read. “What’s more, when you turn the graph upside down, the link is even stronger”.

The editorial said claims that the virus was spread through coughing, sneezing or bodily contact were dubious. “We’ve had coughing and sneezing for millennia, but we’ve never had coronavirus. That theory simply doesn’t hold weight. But since the increase in arson over the Australian summer, coronavirus infections have skyrocketed. Coincidence? No”.

It said the Greens’ opposition to land clearing had also increased the spread of the disease.

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