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Abbott Takes On New Role As Spokesperson For Antarctica Tropical Resort Industry

In his inaugural speech for the Antarctica Tropical Resort Association (ATRA), Tony Abbott said that climate change is beneficial, particularly for Antarctic regions looking to become the next big beach holiday destination.  

Pointing out that very few families currently visit the southern most tip of the globe for their beach-breaks, Mr Abbott said it was in everyone’s interest to bump up emissions for the sake of struggling Antarctica resort operators.

“I don’t know if you’ve been to Antarctica recently for a getaway, but it can get bloody cold in bathers,” Mr Abbott said. “But if we really give global warming a push, we’ll soon be able to sunbake on Mawson’s bay while sipping a cocktail and watching penguins. If they’re still alive”.

Mr Abbott said that the artic industry could soon be targeting schoolies groups, weddings and honeymooners. “We all have a role to play. Run your car overnight, leave the lights on, start a coal mine. Every little helps”.

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