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PM Agrees To Give Nation Sick Day On Monday To Recover From Watching Abbott/Hanson Video

Malcolm Turnbull has suggested all Australians spend a day resting up on Monday, to ensure that the nausea caused by seeing Tony Abbott and Pauline Hanson make awkward small talk has totally passed.

“I pressed play accidentally myself on Friday and I’m still making regular trips to the bathroom,” Mr Turnbull explained this morning. “Lucy spent most of the night hunched over the toilet bowl”.

Health experts have applauded the move, saying there were psychological impacts to consider too. “This was unexpected and quite gruesome. I particularly worry about any young children who have seen this video,” psychologist Tara Hubert said. “There may be delayed reactions – people can expect to feel quite unsettled for some time. The images could well linger in our minds for months”.

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