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Sepp Blatter Willing To Speak About Corruption At FIFA, For A Fair Price

The President of world soccer’s governing body FIFA has vigorously denied there has been any corruption at his organisation, but said he would be willing to discuss the issue in more detail if there was perhaps some sort of arrangement that could be reached.

“I absolutely reject these allegations of systemic corruption, but of course, I am always open to discussing these serious issues further. Maybe there’s something you have that I need, that you no longer need?”

Pushed further, Mr Blatter said, “I have no knowledge of any wrongdoing. But let’s just say my memory could be brought to life in the right, how do you say, ‘environment’”.

Pushed further still, Mr Blatter said, “Just bring a suitcase full of cash and I’ll tell you what you need to know”.

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