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Trendy New Steamed Dumpling Restaurant Opens In Gwyneth Paltrow’s Vagina

Billed as the hottest new night out in Los Angeles, an entrepreneurial chef is making the most of all the steam coming from Gwyneth Paltrow’s vagina, opening a chic hole-in-the-wall style dumpling house.

Although the unconventional venue had diners initially perplexed, Goop Dumpling House is now the place to be seen, with waits of up to three hours on weekends. The restaurant serves eight different types of freshly steamed dumplings, flavoured with the aromatic herb mugwort.

“This is sustainable cooking. We’re just using all of this steam and hot air that’s freely available here,” explained chef Pin Lee. He said plans were in place to make use of Paltrow’s bullshit in the future. “There’s plenty around”.

Diners and critics alike are raving. “It’s new, it’s different, it’s intimate. It’s the best dumpling house inside a vagina in California,” one diner said.

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