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Doctors Desperately Trying To Photoshop Kim Jong-Un Back To Life

Gravely ill and suffering from suspected heart issues, North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un was last night being operated on by the country’s best Photoshop technicians.

At press time, reports suggested the leader had a new pair of legs, with experts close to finishing the retouching of his feet, hands and elbows. “You can hardly tell he was sick at all,” a spokesperson said.

Suspicions about Kim’s health were first raised when he failed to attend an important parliamentary session this week. But officials say he will be back in action this week, and will be a central figure in pictures of upcoming parliamentary sessions.

“He’ll be back mingling with our top officials, our armed forces, and visiting our factories in no time. His image is as bright as ever. Possibly a little too bright after Ki-Nam went a bit overboard with that filter” the official said.


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