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ASIO To Watch While You Have Sex

An ASIO agent will be discreetly stationed behind a curtain when you have sex tonight, Attorney-General George Brandis revealed today.

Mr Brandis said the agent, who will collect general data about your activities and monitor your movements for any suspicious behaviour, will not obtrude on your normal activities. “You won’t even notice he’s there,” Brandis said.

The initiative is designed to curb terrorist attacks on Australian soil, which have doubled in recent months.


While some rights campaigners expressed concern at the expanding powers of Australia’s spy agencies, Mr Brandis assured people that there was no need for alarm. “If you do nothing wrong, you’ve got nothing to worry about,” he said.


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