Freedom Reduced In Order To Maintain Freedom

tony abbott

Government monitoring and surveillance will increase, hold-without charge laws will be re-introduced, and restrictions will be ramped up, in order to preserve Australians’ freedom, it was announced today.

“Having the government read all your emails and telling you where you can and can’t travel is fair enough if we want to live in a free country,” a spokesperson for the Government said today.

Prime Minister Tony Abbott stressed that Australians “should always live normally because the terrorists’ goal is to scare us out of being ourselves”. He then reminded Australians of the very real threat of terrorism in this country.

For breaking stories, follow The Shovel on Facebook and Twitter. Or sign up for email updates at the bottom of this page.

6 Comments

  1. Tom

    September 22, 2014 at 10:30 pm

    I would rather be exposed to the inconveniencies attending too much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it. T. J.
    Thats Thomas Jefferson.

    • Adam

      September 26, 2014 at 7:51 pm

      Really, Thomas Jefferson said ‘inconveniencies’?

    • Tunic

      September 26, 2014 at 11:46 pm

      He sure had a lot of opinions about freedom for a guy who raped his slaves.

  2. Maybe Satire

    September 23, 2014 at 7:03 am

    This just is not satire – this is accurate reporting – a most undesirable and subversive technique. As such, I must remind you of your charter:

    “The Shovel is Australia’s satire news website. That means the stories on this site are made up.”

    After your failure to observe your charter, your funding will be cut – Malcolm Turnbull has assured us that you (along with the ABC) can continue to operate on $1 a day after a cut of a barely noticeable 99.99999%

    As Mr Bolt said in the beacon of freedom know as the Herald Sun, “The Shovel are a bunch of chardonnay-sipping socialists who are continually breaching their charter of making fun of Facebook Users, the Labor Party or other unimportant sectors of the community and are actively undermining the freedom of our great country by expressing ideas contrary to the correct views as laid down by our venerable guru and sage, Murdoch-of-the-NewsCorpse.”

    And don’t think you can fly Tiger Airways – they’re on to you satirists!

  3. Emmjay

    September 23, 2014 at 10:55 am

    Notwithstanding the Shovel’s abandonment of its charter, I thing we should be grateful for the reportage. I personally wasn’t sufficiently afraid before. And I think we also need to thank Tony for demonstrating with his hands just how big the threat is. It’s clearly “THIS BIG”. Cripes ! Hair-raising – see Tony demonstrated that too ! What a guy !

  4. Helen Dawson

    October 8, 2014 at 1:33 pm

    Petition to Senate about holding Tony Abbott accountable to his own ‘Subverting Society’ life sentence in the Counter-Terrorism Bill.
    Please read sign and share if you agree.
    https://www.change.org/p/nick-xenophon-and-senators-hold-prime-minister-tony-abbott-accountable-for-subverting-society/u/8357479?