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Peppa Pig Funding Cuts Called Off After Fears Of Massive Tantrum From Electorate

Prime Minister Tony Abbott said Cabinet toyed for about five minutes with the idea of cutting funding from the ABC cartoon Peppa Pig, before the blood curdling sound of a million young children screaming became too much to bear.

“Brandis said we should stick to our principles and wait it out, but Turnbull and I said, ‘fuck that, just give them back the funding and make the noise stop,’” Mr Abbott said.

“Peppa Pig’s right here, calm down, it’s not going anywhere,” Mr Abbott confirmed.

In December last year claims that Peppa Pig was a leftwing feminist mouthpiece led to the ABC conceding that popular children’s character Mr Squiggle was a puppet.

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