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Medicare To Be Replaced By Homeopathy

Health Minister Peter Dutton today announced plans to replace the nation’s health system with a homeopathy subscription service, following research that showed homeopathy is totally useless.

“This is the rigorous scientific research we’ve been waiting to ignore,” Mr Dutton said at a press conference this morning.

The change – which will see Australians delivered a range of homeopathic treatments to their homes – will save an estimated $500 billion over the next five years as traditional medical facilities are closed or phased out.

Production of the new homeopathic treatments will be begin at Victoria’s desalination plant from next month.

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