Follow The Shovel

ABC Comes Clean: “Mr Squiggle Was A Puppet”

Just days after journalist Piers Akerman exposed ABC cartoon character Peppa Pig as a left-wing feminist mouthpiece, the Australian national broadcaster has conceded that iconic children’s television star Mr Squiggle was nothing more than a puppet.

The confession comes after months of speculation, with some insiders saying it had been an open secret in the industry for years that the ABC was pulling the strings.

This morning ABC Managing Director Mark Scott said it was time to tell the truth about Mr Squiggle. “He was under ABC control from the start; Mr Squiggle did what we told him to do. He was the face, but there were people above him controlling every single move,” Mr Scott said.

Columnist Andrew Bolt added fuel to the fire late today by suggesting Mr Squiggle’s co-star – Blackboard – had chosen to identify as black purely for political and career-development reasons.

Blackboard angrily denied the allegations, saying they had the potential to turn his life upside down. Mr Squiggle was unavailable for comment.

The Shovel is Australia’s satire website. For more, follow The Shovel on Facebook and Twitter.

Become a Shovel member. Or follow us on Email | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram