In a final nod to the benefits of market capitalism, Baroness Thatcher has, on her deathbed, asked that all public memories of her be privatised.
A spokesperson for the family said it was a chance to “whip the memories into shape, cut costs and, in doing so, become more competitive in global markets”.
“Memories, when placed in the Public’s hands, are poorly managed and can quickly become bloated and inefficient,” the spokesperson said.
Political analyst George Bettino conceded that large swathes of Britain will be happy to be rid of their recollections of the Iron Lady, but predicted there would be strong interest for the memories amongst certain sections of society.
Money raised from the privatisation will go towards financing Mrs Thatcher’s State-funded funeral.