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Clive Palmer announces intentions to build an exact replica of his old reputation

Queensland Mining magnate Clive Palmer revealed today that he is in advanced talks with an international PR company to rebuild his reputation from scratch. 

Under the plans, the PR company would build an exact replica of Palmer’s reputation as it appeared before he totally lost all sense of perspective and reality several years ago.

Some observers say the task is overly ambitious. “The idea is full of holes. Some reputations just can’t be replicated or rebuilt,” commented one journalist. “Just this year the guy’s tried to set up a new football league, sued the Government, concocted CIA conspiracy theories and revealed on air that he is in love with Tony Jones. You can’t salvage a reputation after that”.

But a defiant Palmer, who has proven his critics wrong before, vowed to push ahead with the Titanic task, saying he planned to launch the new reputation in time for next year’s election show-down with the Labor Party.

In an unrelated announcement today, Palmer declared his intention to run in this year’s US Presidential election.

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