All posts tagged "comedy website"
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‘30 Newspolls In A Row Is The New 20 Newspolls In A Row’, Turnbull Says
Reaching 30 negative political surveys in a row these days feels the same as reaching 20 negative political surveys in a row back in 2015,...
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88% Of Relationships Begun by Colliding into Person Holding Stack of Files, Research Finds
A decades long study by the University of California has found that 88% of all relationships are begun by colliding unexpectedly into a person holding...
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Time To Move On (To Next Massacre) US Legislators Say
After three days of grieving, legislators in the US have said it is now time for Americans to put the Florida shooting behind them and...
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God Forgets To Send Plague To Destroy Australia
The Almighty Father slept in this morning, missing the opportunity to punish Australia for allowing two people of the same sex to get married.
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Kevin Andrews Announces Plans To Whip Himself Every Time A Gay Couple Gets Married
Liberal MP Kevin Andrews says he will begin a ritual of self flagellation to atone for the sins of gay Australians.
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Innovative New Amazon Service Allows Customers To Send Christmas Gifts Directly To Landfill
Online department store Amazon says it is ‘cutting out the middle man’ by allowing customers to send everything from toys and homewares to trampolines and...
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House Of Cards Sacks President Over Sexual Assault Claims, In Wild Diversion From Reality
After being lauded for its brutally realistic portrayal of American politics for five seasons, House of Cards has decided to shift into the fantasy genre,...
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Trump Named Time Magazine’s ‘Toddler of the Year’
Donald Trump has been named the most influential little boy in the world.
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Famed Spanish Restorer Called In To Fix $450 Million ‘Salvator Mundi’
Selling for a world-record $450 million at auction last night, Leonardo Da Vinci’s Salvator Mundi ‘still needed some work’, according to experts.
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Same Sex Marriage Opponents Now Enjoying Last Few Moments Before Their Lives Are Dramatically Unchanged
Those opposed to same sex marriage say it is now only a matter of time before two people they’ve never even met will be allowed...
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Lonely Planet Releases Tantalising List Of Top 10 Roundabouts To Visit In Canberra
After announcing Canberra as the third best city to visit in the world in 2018, Lonely Planet has given travellers a hint of what to...
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Family Reliant On Government Hand-outs To Have Third Child
In a decision that many are labelling irresponsible, a Kensington couple who only two years ago had their second child, is to have another, despite...
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Outrage! North Korea Drops Nuclear Test Just DAYS After Taylor’s Single
In a twist no one saw coming, North Korea has thrown serious shade at T-Swift by releasing their nuclear test in the same week as...
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Smoking e-Cigarettes Significantly Lowers Risk Of Looking Cool, Report Finds
Vaping decreases the risk of contracting cancer and fitting in socially, a report has found.
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Trump Restless As North Korea Briefing Ambles Past 30 Second Mark
Tapping his fingers on the table and looking impatiently around the room, US President Donald Trump asked if things could perhaps be sped up a...
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