World
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Trump’s Top Landscaping Tips To Prevent Forest Fires
In this exclusive feature, the people’s president lets us in on his favourite landscaping techniques to keep your garden free from apocalyptic climate disasters. Cut...
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New Compromise Brexit Deal Lets Britain Retain Right To Constantly Complain About It
British PM Theresa May has brokered a new deal with Europe that would see Britain leave the EU completely, but retain the right to incessantly...
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Putin Admits He Forgot To Vote In Midterms
A sheepish Vladimir Putin has confessed he totally forgot to vote in yesterday’s US midterms, despite a concerted push in America to get more people...
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Pipe Bombs Made From US Steel, Trump Reassures Americans
Donald Trump has told a rally that while he doesn’t condone the home-made pipe bombs that were sent to Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, it...
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Baby Makes Historic Appearance At UN General Assembly
In what is a first for the United Nations, a baby has made an appearance at a General Assembly meeting in New York.
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Trump Praises Malcolm Trumble, Congratulates Scott Morrible
US President Donald Trump has sent his condolences to deposed Prime Minister Malcolm Trumble and phoned to congratulate new Prime Minister Scott Morrible.
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White House Denies Trump Used N-Word, Says President Doesn’t Know Any Words Starting With ‘N’
A spokesperson for Donald Trump says it is impossible that the President used the N-word on the set of The Apprentice, because he doesn’t know...
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Explosive New Tape Reveals One Time Trump Didn’t Pay For Sex
A new secret recording has emerged revealing a conversation between US President Donald Trump and an unnamed woman, in which Trump appears to get laid...
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Melania Meant To Say ‘I Don’t’
Melania Trump has issued a statement today clarifying any confusion among the public about whether or not she actually wants to be married to Donald.
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Editorial: We Believe Donald Trump When He Says He Misspoke
On Tuesday Donald Trump said he took Vladimir Putin at his word when he assured him that Russia had played no part in meddling in...
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Winner Of US Election Meets With Donald Trump In Helsinki
The winner of the 2016 US Presidential election took time out from his busy schedule to meet with Donald Trump in Helsinki today.
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Brexit Hardliners Call On Britain To Leave Planet
Britain’s Brexit crisis deepened today, with several hard-line MPs stating that Britain should leave Earth, catching many world leaders by surprise.
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Trump Boasts To Queen About How Much Property He Owns
Referring to himself as ‘property royalty’, Donald Trump offered to give the Queen a free lesson in wealth accumulation, as the two walked through the...
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“It Was A Tragedy” Lions Who Killed Poachers Say They Forgot To Take Selfie For Social Media
The pride of lions who attacked and killed a group of rhino poachers in a South African game park say they have made a grave...
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Melania Trump Travels To Event Wearing Hideous, Inappropriate Husband
The First Lady has been widely condemned for going out in public sporting an offensive husband in a move that many have described as ‘tone...
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