Local
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Amazing! Santa Uses Same Wrapping Paper As Mum And Dad, Local Investigation Finds
In a stunning coincidence, Santa Clause uses the exact same wrapping paper as Mum and Dad, Chloe Simpson, 6, has revealed.
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Level Of Confected Outrage ‘ABSOLUTELY SICKENING’ Online Commenter Says
A man has labelled as ‘absolutely disgusting’ the amount of contrived outrage that passes for comment these days.
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Renters Unveil World’s Tiniest Violin For Home Owners Whose Properties Have Fallen In Value
Renters across the nation unveiled the world’s tiniest violin today in a touching tribute to home owners suffering from dropping property values.
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Gender Height Gap May Take Years To Close, Experts Say
The gap between men and women is expected to remain at least 14cm for the foreseeable future, experts have warned.
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Sickly, Fading Plastic Shopping Bag Told It Only Has 10,000 Years To Live
Feeling broken and past its prime, a supermarket shopping bag was today given just 10,000 years to live.
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New 3/4 Diet Requires You To Speak About Diet 3/4 Of The Time
A revolutionary new diet which requires devotees to speak about the diet to friends and family three out of every four minutes, has been labeled...
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Man Dies After Removing Memory Stick Without Properly Ejecting It First
Described by friends and family as ‘reckless’ and ‘fearless’, Sydney man Johnny White was found dead this morning holding a USB memory stick. His laptop...
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Dad Looking Forward To Wedding Of Prince Harry And Angela Merkel
Melbourne Dad Roger Waterman says he plans to watch Prince Harry marry the German Chancellor this weekend.
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There Is Nothing Else You Can Help Us With Today, Nation Tells Call Centre Workers
“We know why we called”, the nation told call centre operators around the country today.
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Smug Man Who Shut Down His Facebook Frantically Looking For Way To Tell Friends And Family
Feeling very pleased with himself after shutting down a social media service that most other people don’t have the discipline or awareness to extract themselves...
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