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Nation’s Teens Unsure How To Measure Self Worth Now That Instagram Not Showing Likes
Sydney student Lily Maples has been left without any way of determining her value to society, it has emerged.
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Boomers Awarded Most Annoying Generation. Millennials Furious They Didn’t Get Participation Trophy
An award ceremony for most annoying generation – won by Baby Boomers – has been marred by controversy, after the Millennials were not given a...
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Man’s Conversation Skills Entirely Reliant On Simpson’s References
Saying it was like that Simpson’s episode where Homer breaks his jaw and can’t speak, a Sydney man has admitted he literally can’t go two...
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Link Between Large Headphones And Nagging Sense Of Superiority, Research Finds
People who wear oversized headphones have a far better taste in music than you, it has been revealed.
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Woman Mistakenly Thinks Friends Give Shit About Her Holiday
In what has been described as a gross misunderstanding, a Brisbane women somehow assumed her friends were interested in seeing 141 photos of her sipping...
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Level Of Confected Outrage ‘Absolutely Sickening’ Online Commenter Says
A woman has labelled as ‘absolutely disgusting’ the amount of contrived outrage that passes for comment these days.
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EDM Bros Step In To Offer Free Pill Testing At Festivals
A group of brave young ravers is offering to personally test festival-goers’ pills at all major music events this year, in the absence of a...
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Man Complaining About Hot Cross Buns In January Yet To Realise He Doesn’t Have To Buy Them
A Melbourne man who has spent most of 2019 complaining about how hot cross buns are already on supermarket shelves, is yet to realise he...
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British Man Immediately Loses 50 Pounds After Joining Gym
London man John Smythe is already halfway towards achieving his 2019 goal of shedding 100 pounds, saying he dropped 50 pounds the moment he signed...
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