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20% Of Nation’s Elbows Have Coronavirus, Experts Confirm
Hairdressers To Remain Open Provided They Cut Hair From 1.5m Away
Contagion And 5 Other Documentaries To Watch While You’re In Lockdown
Nation’s Dogs Announce Plans To Continue Working From Home
Mexico Asks Trump To Hurry Up And Build The Fucking Wall
5 Million New Podcasts To Launch Next Week
Next Season Of MAFS Will Be ‘Married At First Skype’, Nine Confirms
2020 Cancelled
Shoppers Rush To Supermarkets To Get Coronavirus
Marrickville Coles Totally Out Of Typewriters And Vintage Suitcases, As Panic Buying Continues
AFL Clubs Call Urgent Meeting With GWS To Learn What It’s Like To Play With No Spectators
World Relieved That Level-Headed, Compassionate Leader In Charge During Biggest Crisis In A Generation
Local Man Surprised To Learn About This New ‘Washing Your Hands’ Thing
Local Introvert Prepares For Coronavirus By Self-Isolating For Last 20 Years
Condolences Flow In, After Fans Learn Tom Hanks Was On The Gold Coast
Man Who Has Runny Nose And Fucking Hates His Job Pretty Sure He Has Coronavirus
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