All posts by The Shovel
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Fraser Anning ‘Not The Right Kind Of Racist’, Bob Katter Says
Bob Katter has expelled senator Fraser Anning from the Katter Australia Party, saying he wasn’t the type of racist his party was looking for.
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Pipe Bombs Made From US Steel, Trump Reassures Americans
Donald Trump has told a rally that while he doesn’t condone the home-made pipe bombs that were sent to Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama, it...
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“I Rarely Think About The Leadership Coup Against Me 1,946 Days Ago,” Rudd Says At Launch Of 600-Page Memoir
Launching the 300,000-word second instalment of his political memoirs, former PM Kevin Rudd said he has hardly given a second thought to the night he...
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Sad, Dejected Scott Morrison Asks Pet Piece Of Coal Why Wentworth Voters Deserted Him
Gently stroking the top of its little head, Prime Minister Scott Morrison this morning looked down at his pet coal, Robert, and quietly asked why...
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Voting For An Independent In Wentworth Will Lead To Instability, Says Nation’s Fifth Prime Minister Since 2013
A vote for an independent is a vote for unpredictability, Australia’s temporary Prime Minister told voters in Wentworth today.
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Government Accidentally Reintroduces White Australia Policy
In what is turning out to be a farcical week for the Government, the Coalition has accidentally reintroduced the White Australia policy, following an administrative...
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The 2018 Shovel Annual Is The Perfect Christmas Gift
It was the year that our Deputy Prime Minister confessed he’d been drunk for the past 18 months, our biggest bank admitted it was collecting...
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Last 5 Years Of Government Was An Administrative Error, Cormann Confirms
The Coalition’s leader in the Senate, Mathias Cornmann has blamed an administrative error as the reason for the past five years of government.
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“We Broke Royal Baby News Six Months Ago” Woman’s Day Reminds Readers
A frustrated editor of tabloid magazine Woman’s Day has reminded readers that her journalists first broke the story of Harry and Meghan’s pregnancy back in...
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“It’s Ok To Be White” White Person Tells Other White People In Parliament Run By White People
A leader of a political party has told her parliamentary colleagues to imagine the sort of influence white people could have if they weren’t held...
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Woman Pregnant
A woman is expecting a child, it has been revealed.
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Morrison Unveils New Fast Train Service
The Morrison Government today unveiled plans for the nation’s first fast train service, which will revolutionise train travel in Australia, according to the Prime Minister.
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Discrimination Is What Jesus Was All About, Morrison Says
Defending the right of Christian schools to discriminate against students and teachers, Scott Morrison said it was entirely appropriate because, when you think about it,...
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Alan Jones Calls On John Williamson To Change ‘True Blue’ To ‘Winnie Blue’
In a fiery exchange on radio this morning, broadcaster Alan Jones demanded to know why singing legend John Williamson would not cede to his demands...
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UFC Championship Bout Marred By Violence
The much anticipated UFC Championship showdown between Khabib Nurmagomedov and Conor McGregor degenerated into an ugly fight on Saturday night after their brutal bout saw...
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