Follow The Shovel

Energy Policy: Australia To Be Entirely Powered By Tony Abbott’s Bullshit By 2020

Tony Abbott’s ongoing bullsh*t will provide enough energy to power the nation for a generation, a Coalition policy report claims.

Announcing the new policy today, Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull said Mr Abbott was a self-renewing resource that was seemingly endless. “Just when you think we’re almost out of bullshit, we discover huge new reserves. It’s a renewable resource,” he said.

He said the energy created every time Mr Abbott opened his mouth could power a small town. “It’s a mix of air, wind and lot of faecal matter – it’s totally sustainable”.

Asked to comment on the policy, Mr Abbott said some shit about goats and gods, which was then sent straight to the grid.

Like this? Donate to The Shovel. And follow us on Email | Facebook Twitter Instagram

Become a Shovel member. Or follow us on Email | Facebook | Twitter | Instagram