New Homeopathic Treatment Significantly Reduces Levels Of Cash In Your Wallet, Study Finds

An innovative new natural remedy released this week can lower the amount of money you carry on your body by up to 60%, studies have found.

Sold in tablet form and retailing for $59.95 a bottle, the breakthrough treatment will provide immediate relief to the wallets of desperate patients.

Sam Mathews, a scientist on the research team, said the new drug was found under strict double-blind testing to be 23 times more effective at reducing wallet size than a placebo. “We were amazed at just how efficient this new treatment is at lowering your finances. In some cases the effects were virtually immediate,” he said.

A spokesperson for the manufacturer said patients should take eleven tablets, eight times daily for best results.

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